Yadda Yadda Yadda, Sexy, Blah Blah Blah

People Magazine just published their annual Sexiest Man Alive issue and, no surprise really, Australian Actor-Hunk, Hugh Jackman is their pick for The Year 2008. Yawn City. I mean, Hugh Jackman is okay, don’t get me wrong. I wouldn’t kick him out of bed for eating crackers. And he’s infinite light years ahead of last year’s SMA, Matt Damon. But other guys on the list, like Brad Pitt and David Beckham, are just so totally played. That aside, People came a little bit closer to my matching my eclectic taste in men this year, as three of my favorites sexy dudes are also on their list. Check it out!

Barack Obama

He is really the sexiest man alive for me right now, in this moment. But I respect his wife too much to go on and on about it.

Michael Phelps*

I only watched about 2 seconds of the Olympics, so I didn’t see a ton of footage of Michael Phelps splashing around in a pool or anything. And he is kind of goofy looking. But Phelps’ body has been plastered all over the internet, TV and print ads for the past however many months. Enough for me to figure out that his body is just insane. There is no question: I’d do it.

John Hamm*

While Hamm is a bit too traditionally “GQ” for my taste, he’s still mmmm…Delicious.

Joseph Gordon Levitt

I actually think he might be gay (he was pretty convincing in The Mysterious Skin), but Joseph Gordon Levitt still does that little thing to me (you know, “that little thing”).

Dhani Harrison

It seems wrong to want to bang George Harrison’s son. And yet, I want to anyway.

Viggo Mortensen

I go for Viggo. No explanation necessary.

David Bowie Circa The Man Who Fell to Earth

I just saw this movie on Netflix DVD and, seriously, he is naked in at least half of it.

Javier Bardem*

Javier is Sexiness Distilled.

Stephen Moyer

Moyer plays the ultra dreamy vampire hero, Bill Compton on True Blood. Even all covered with dirt and blood, he slays me.

Gael Garcia Bernal

Have you seen Amores Perros? It’s got to be one of the most fucked up, ultra-violent, ridiculously tragic, squirm-inducing and ultimately heartbreaking films I’ve seen. But I’d watch it again just see Gael Garcia Bernal get naked. Even if he is only 5′7″ tall, he is so gorgeous he makes me feel retarded.

* Also Appears on People’s List

Seether: Bad Ass Central (John on Far Left)

It is no secret that I like to Rock, and I really don’t do it as much as I should, mostly because sometimes I prefer to nap. But Emmy and I had a fucking blast last night when we went to see Seether. Here is how the night went down:

Had excellent Public Transportation Karma with the trains

Cut to the front of the miles-long line outside the Hammerstein Ballroom by lying about our guest list tickets being at will call, when we had our tickets on us (but our passes were at will call, so it was only a half-lie. Still, it worked and that is what counts).

Got right in with no problem (See above ruse)

Inserted Earplugs appropriately

Made our way backstage while Papa Roach was still doing their set

Ate some Snacks in catering (Tiramisu = Quite Good!)

Met up with my friend John (Seether Drummer)

Watched Seether’s show from side stage (totally awesome)

Avoided bodily injury

Hung out with Marco the Vic Firth stick guy, and the drummer from the Dictators

Got invited to the Aftershow Party

Decided not to stay for Staind (No Brainer)

Froze ass off walking four blocks to the Aftershow party

Stopped at Papaya King to enjoy a delicious “President Obama Special” 99 cent hot dog

Continued one half a block to Aftershow party held upstairs at Stitch, a very dark bar

Ate Fried Snacks

Drank Mexican Beer

Hung out with John for hours

Took a Cab Home

In Bed by 1:00 AM

RAD FUN!

Are you one of those people who calls in sick to work so you can watch crap-ass Daytime TV? If so, maybe you have seen a talk show called The Doctors, featuring former The Bachelor contestant, Dr. Travis Stork.  Long story short, it’s got a panel of “Medical Experts” trying to keep a straight face while discussing “Hot Button” medical topics. I’ve never really watched the show, because I work for a living, but I’ve seen clips of it on You Tube, and here’s my diagnosis: The Doctors is retarded. These guys are complete quacks. A week or so ago they were trying to convince anyone who’s stupid enough to take this show seriously that it is not only actually happening but even possible that women are rampantly inserting tampons soaked with VODKA into their snatch for kicks. Not only is this idea absurd to the point of bordering on urban legend but it’s honestly impossible to do. I mean, unless you’re into fisting yourself or there’s some kind of tiny “tampon shoe horn” type device you’d be using, no way. Today I saw clip on one of the blogs I read regularly where The Doctors are showing you how to properly wipe your ass. I wish I was making this up. What I want to know is who blew a goat to get this show on the air?

Yep, That’s What it is

It’s been a couple of weeks since I put some kind of thing that looks-tastes-performs like bacon on this here blog. So, let’s take a look at today’s bacon-thing: the Bacon iPhone Case. How stylish!

Thanks be to Boing Boing Dot net for the tip!

“When I joined Slayer and I went on tour with them, there’s one particular memory that sticks out for me. We were already working on the new record and right before we went into the studio I went to a club in Hollywood to see Fu Manchu. I remember this one guy was standing there with his girlfriend and he walked up to me, because he recognized me. He was this tall, buff guy. He’s looking at me and he says, ‘So, I hear you’re the new drummer for Slayer.’ And I said. “Yeah, how are you doing? My name is Paul.’  First he gives me this once over, and then he looks at me like he’s thinking, ‘How could this guy replace Dave Lombardo?’ I remember he reached over, grabbed my bicep and squeezed it to see if I was really strong. Then he looked at me, shook his head and walked away. I remember thinking, ‘Okay, so what I need to do to win over the fans is go to the gym.’ It was the funniest thing because I remember wondering how the size of my bicep related to how well I play the drums. I just stood there in complete shock.”

I honestly can’t recall ever watching more than one or two episodes, let alone an entire season, of any Showtime series ever in my life. Because I’m really more of an HBO gal. But Metropolitan Home’s Showtime House, a newly renovated town home located in NYC’s exclusive Gramercy Park neighborhood (my dentist has his office there) where each room is decorated to thematically tie-in with a popular Showtime series, has me intrigued to maybe rent the past few seasons of Dexter on DVD. Because, man, that dining room is just rad.

See the various room interiors of Showtime House and read all about the project at this link.

Pink Lounge

The United Colors of Conformity

Here’s a visually-driven website that’s good for hours of time wasting fun! “Rotterdam-based photographer Ari Versluis and profiler Ellie Uyttenbroek have worked together since October 1994. Inspired by a shared interest in the striking dress codes of various social groups, they have systematically documented numerous identities over the last 14 years. Rotterdam’s heterogeneous, multicultural street scene remains a major source of inspiration for Ari Versluis and Ellie Uyttenbroek, although since 1998 they have also worked in cities abroad. They call their series Exactitudes: a contraction of exact and attitude.

By registering their subjects in an identical framework, with similar poses and a strictly observed dress code, Versluis and Uyttenbroek provide an almost scientific, anthropological record of people’s attempts to distinguish themselves from others by assuming a group identity. The apparent contradiction between individuality and uniformity is, however, taken to such extremes in their arresting objective-looking photographic viewpoint and stylistic analysis that the artistic aspect clearly dominates the purely documentary element.”
— Wim van Sinderen, Senior Curator Museum of Photography, The Hague

Sixteen Little Baby Toes!

Here at The Worley Gig, we enjoy freakish things. However, we do not generally blog about freaks of nature, because we find that to be in questionable taste. That said, I was oddly charmed by this picture of a Baby born in rural China with eight toes on each foot, because look at all of those little toes! Other than being digitally challenged (he’s apparently got extra fingers but no thumbs, for ten digits on each hand) the baby has a normal face and body and appears to be healthy. Here’s the Reader’s Digest Condensed-version of the story, according to Shanghaiist.com: “Two new parents from Leizhou, Guangdong got a bit of a surprise last week when they discovered that their newborn baby boy had eight toes on each foot. The baby has the usual number of fingers (ten in total), but oddly enough, no thumbs at all. Doctors say the birth anomaly could have been caused by either genetics or environmental pollution, though that doesn’t seem like much of a prognosis to us at all.” This is a bit of a drag for the child but certainly not anything that can’t be adapted to and overcome. Maybe a group of philanthropic doctors will even donate their facilities and services to reconstruct the baby’s feet by removing a couple of toes. I’m not sure how easy it will be to adjust to life in a world where having opposable thumbs is the norm, but I imagine having no thumbs from birth will make that hurdle easier to tackle when he comes to it. Good luck to you, little many-toed baby!